While the randomness of life here has become normal, the hilarity of it all never gets old.
And a couple of things that happened in the last two weeks are right up there with the best of them.
A Wednesday night two weeks ago found various volunteers out at a local, trendy, outdoor restaurant – The Brewery by O! (Great name by the way. I wonder who ‘O’ is?) We had visited once before and the service was awful, but the beer is fairly cheap and it’s a nice atmosphere to sit outside, so we thought we’d try again.
The night started out fairly normal, until the food started arriving. Luckily for me, the burrito that I ordered came out first along with Paul’s. I/we waited the customary length of time – 26 seconds – and then had no choice but to munch away. I/we couldn’t let the thing get cold and we were assured the food for the other 5 people at the table was on the way.
As I licked my plate clean and sipped on my beer, the rest of the food still hadn’t appeared. When we asked, we were told it was coming right away – 30 minutes passed, then 1 hour. At about the 70 minute mark, one other dish suddenly appeared followed by mysterious plates of nachos (exactly 6 nachos per plate). After explaining these weren’t ours, they took them away and said the other food was almost here.It was at this point when we started to have some serious discussions with the manager, who had been standing by our table all night, smiling like a dope. The discussion went something like this:
Us (okay maybe it was just Beth) – “What’s happening?”
Manager – “It’s taking a long time.”
Us/Beth – “Yes, we know that, but why?”
Manager – “Is everything alright?”
Us/Beth – “What? No, it’s bad, very, very bad. This is very, very bad.”
Manager (goofy smile fading and walking back to his standing place near our table, but a little further away this time) – “Oh, yes.”
Another 20 minutes passed with no food appearing, and we slowly moved from outrage, to disbelief, to all out laughter. The whole situation had become a farce. And Paul and I were enjoying it the most as we had eaten hours ago and were looking forward to snack on the new arrival of food.
At one point in the debacle, they actually brought out a pint of beer for someone in a glass that held a bit more liquid than a humming bird’s beak. When we refused to accept it, all the waiter could sadly say was, “Glass, nay.” Hahaha…awesome answer.
Finally, the rest of the food appeared…except for Anne Murray’s burrito. The same burrito that she had graciously passed up to Paul and me since hers was surely right behind – 2 hours previous. Poor Anne. As everyone else ate, there was Anne, asking everyone who passed our table – “Where’s my burrito?” No one knew. And no one seemed to care.
When the elusive burrito finally did arrive, it was cold, but she ate it like the Scottish trooper she is.
Amazingly, when the bill arrived, it actually was correct and didn’t contain all the mystery food and thimbles of beer that they tried to pass off on us. What happened, you ask? Why did it take so long? Who knows, I say. Save your energy for other things than figuring out why things happen the way they do in Sri Lanka. It’s far too hot.
My second story is a short one. In fact, it’s not even a story, but a very short email I received from an email address that I thought belonged to a media outlet. I had just sent out a news release on dementia and dementia services in Sri Lanka to all my media contacts in the country, and this is an email that I got back, almost immediately in reply:
Stupid who wantys your advice.go and wash your penis
Sent via BlackBerry® from Dialog
This is possibly the best email I’ve ever received. Thank you for the laugh…and the reminder.